Do you always try to be perfect at everything? Maybe you spend hours making sure your homework is just right, or you worry about little mistakes from the past. If this sounds like you, you're probably a perfectionist.

Being a perfectionist means you try to do everything perfectly, but sometimes, that can actually make things harder for you. Let’s talk about why perfectionism can be bad and what you can do about it!

What Does It Mean to Be a Perfectionist?

Being a perfectionist means you set really high standards for yourself. You want everything to be perfect, and if things don’t go as planned, you feel bad about it. Perfectionists can even feel embarrassed or ashamed when they mess up, and they might avoid situations where they think they could fail. Imagine feeling upset just because you didn’t get everything perfect—that’s how perfectionists feel sometimes!

Why Perfectionism Can Be Harmful

You might think being perfect is a good thing because it helps you succeed. But guess what? Some studies show that being too focused on being perfect can actually make you feel more anxious or sad. It can even make you feel like you’re not good enough, even if you do your best!

In one study, researchers looked at over 57,000 people and found that perfectionism was linked to feelings of depression, anxiety, and stress. So while it might seem like perfectionism helps you do well, it can actually hurt your mental health.

Some researchers believe that perfectionism might even cause depression over time. This means that perfectionism might make you feel worse instead of better!

Can Perfectionism Ever Be Good?

Some psychologists think there can be a “healthy” kind of perfectionism. This is when you want to do your best but you don’t beat yourself up if things don’t go perfectly. It’s about having high standards without being too hard on yourself. But many researchers believe perfectionism is never really helpful, because it’s not just about trying your best—it’s about never accepting anything less than perfect, which can make you unhappy.

Has Perfectionism Gotten Worse?

Have you ever noticed that some people seem to expect more from you than ever before? Well, it’s not just in your head! Studies show that over the years, people—especially students—have started feeling more pressure to be perfect. It’s like everyone around us expects us to do our best all the time, and that can make us feel stressed out. Maybe it's because society today is so competitive, and that pressure can make perfectionism even worse.

How Can You Stop Being a Perfectionist?

It’s okay if you want to do your best, but being a perfectionist isn’t the best way to go about it. Here’s how you can stop being a perfectionist and feel better about yourself:

1. Learn to Grow, Not Just to Be Perfect

One way to avoid perfectionism is to develop a “growth mindset.” This means believing that you can improve over time, even if you make mistakes. Instead of seeing mistakes as failures, think of them as chances to learn! When you try hard, even if you don’t get everything perfect, you’re still learning and growing.

2. Be Kind to Yourself

Another great way to stop being a perfectionist is to practice self-compassion. This means being nice to yourself when you make mistakes, just like you would be kind to a friend. Instead of saying, “So bad at this,” try saying, “It’s okay. Everyone makes mistakes. Just try again!” Being kind to yourself helps you feel better, even when things don’t go as planned.

3. Talk to a Professional

If you’re struggling with perfectionism, talking to a psychologist can help. They can help you change the way you think about mistakes and help you feel better about not being perfect all the time.

Remember, Mistakes Are Okay!

The most important thing to remember is that nobody is perfect, and that’s totally fine! Mistakes are part of learning, and they help you grow. So don’t stress about being perfect—just do your best, be kind to yourself, and enjoy the process of learning and improving!